Tough Day today

Hello All,

Today is August the 18th. This day is bittersweet for me because August 18th was Jackson's birthday. We always did something special for the Pup on his birthday and it usually involved a trip to Petsmart to purchase a new sheep toy and greenie. Sounds silly I know, but they were very special in our lives and still hold a special place in our hearts. Today also marks almost a year since we lost the boys.

I know that God has grown us through this experience and some may not understand the feelings of loss that we have and still have but I can honestly say that we are grateful.

I am grateful for being allowed to have had something in my life that loved me and everyone around me unconditionally. I pray that I can show that kind of love to others. I am grateful that Jackson made such a difference in the lives of the children he got to meet. Many of you know that Jackson spent many days with me through my career at the Advocacy Centers and even was influential in the children's ministry of Mosaic. To some he may be just a dog, but to those kids, he was a companion and friend. He was there in a time when he was needed the most. I pray that others can say that about me.

I am grateful that he wasn't alone in death and that he died protecting someone he loved. Jackson was brother to Sebastian (Tiny) and to Preston. As the pit bull lunged for Tiny and Preston, Jackson stood in the gap and tried to protect his family. I pray that I have that kind of courage to stand up for those who can not protect themselves. I pray that I never forget the value that family has in my heart and life. I pray that when my days here on earth draw to a close, that you will be able to say that I fought the good fight, completed the race set before me and that my Heavenly Father will say to me: "Well done good and faithful servant."

I am grateful because as much as I loved them. I know that it is but a fraction of the amount of love that my Savior has for me. And just like Jackson's love for me, it is unconditional and undeserved.

Thank you Father for the gift that Jackson and Sebastian were to our family and in the lives of others.

I am grateful for Tyson and seeing him through all the struggles that he has faced at such an early age. He has survived a heart surgery, skin infection, and chronic pain. He never complains and you would not know that he even struggles. I know that God gave us Tyson to help us continue to learn and grow. I pray that I can have his fighting spirit and positive attitude.

I am grateful that we still have Preston with us. He is truly Shaun's loyal companion. And he's just plain funny! You can't help but laugh at some of his crazy antics. He also is a loyal friend to Tyson.

As we look forward to meeting little Elliott, may we remember that she is here but for a moment and that she is never really ours, but is the child of her heavenly Father. I am grateful to have had experienced death of our loved one to teach me how painful raising and losing another can be. I know that as a parent, we will experience the pain of growth and separation.

Our Doctor appointment went well. She is still measuring 2 weeks ahead, so not enough to move the due date. We may just have a big baby or she may come early. My blood pressure is good. Her heart is strong and she is very active. I didn't even get threatened with bed rest! :-) Now, we begin going in every two weeks for check ups. At the end of the month we will actually have a 4D sonogram. I can't wait to post it!

We have also been praying for a life verse for Elliott. I think that we have settled on Psalm 40:5. Elliott's name means the Lord is my God. The verse states: Many, O LORD my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.

We know that He has done amazing things in our lives. So many that we can not even begin to explain to others. I know that His gift of Elliott will be another instance of His unexplainable goodness. And for that we are grateful.